In a marriage, quarrels between husband and wife can determine the lasting relationship. Quarrels in the marriage contribute to destroying the relationship in the marriage that can destroy the marriage, what forms of quarrels can damage the relationship in the marriage? Following below are the forms of contention that Indonesiar.com has summarized from various sources:
1. Debating multiple issues at once
When starting an argument or fight, it’s best to talk about and resolve them one by one. Don’t bring up all the trouble at once. You think pouring out all the problems at the same time will save you fighting time? You are wrong, it will only prolong the fighting time.
2. Blaming each other
When fighting or in a state of anger, everyone tends to blame their partner. It’s easy to pinpoint a partner’s mistakes with the phrase “you are like this and like that”. Whenever possible use the word “I” to express feelings. For example, “I was upset because I didn’t feel heard.”
3. Generalize everything
Don’t like to generalize or generalize about things by often saying “you always”, “you never” and “every time you …” as if everything he does is always wrong. This is what makes the quarreling situation worse and unresolved.
4. Criticize your partner too harshly
Excessive and harsh criticism will only hurt feelings, no matter the spouse or other person. Avoid saying things that are really bad and unworthy of hearing or arguments will only destroy the marriage.
5. Committing physical violence and torture
committing physical violence and torture is a criminal act. The act of fighting in this way results in fear and trauma for the victim. Of course, when doing physical violence and torture against a partner will bring insecurity from the partner. Couples will seek self-protection, one of which is by doing a divorce.
6. Incorrect place and time
No one wants to be embarrassed in public or when you are down and sad. Fighting at the wrong place and time will only destroy a marriage. So as much as possible just fight in a place where you don’t need to be witnessed by many people.
Those are the bad habits when fighting that makes married couples often experience marriage destruction. So, in carrying out a married life, of course you must avoid quarrels. Come on, get interesting information and add insight from Indonesiar.com.
